The Continuing Story of Bungalow Bruce

In other Steelers' news, we learned today that all of those Christmas prayers we sent up to the six-pound, eight-ounce baby Jesus may have come true: miraculously, Steelers coach Mike Tomlin finally listened to us and is going to fire Bruce Arians.

This has only been reported on Pittsburgh's local ESPN radio station, so let's not get our hopes up just yet. However, this would be an epic win for Steelers fans if true. Everyone knows that our smashmouth style of play has been tainted with Arians' shoddy playcalling and belief that you don't need a fullback to run the ball (turns out you do).

Frontal view of Bruce "Dreamkiller" Arians.
Seriously, fuck him.

So farewell, Bruce, you bastard. May you take your stupid sunglasses and your staggeringly predictable two tight-end sets to another team, of which I am sure you will do your best to continue your plot to alienate fans and ruin lives. Godspeed, John Glenn.