Friday, October 9, 2009

You big, dumb, walrus-looking douche

Seriously, what a chode.
You really have to give it up to John Bolton. After being appointed U.S. Ambassador by George W. Bush and thus eternally associated with the failure, incompetence and dishonesty that the former president's administration was most famous for, he is taking the ground that everyone else from that era seems to be taking: the embittered, overly-critical and skeptical over all things Democratic ground. It's like they fell on their head and have forgotten how piss-poor the last eight years have been. Anyway, here's Captain Grundel on Obama's guilt trip Nobel Peace Prize nomination:
“I was nominated three years ago and I’m still waiting for the call,” laughs Bolton. “Today’s news is just another demonstration of how politicized the Nobel Peace Prize has become, from President Carter winning in 2002, to Al Gore in 2007, and President Obama in 2009.
You're so right, mustache! Because Carter's Habitat for Humanity is such a shitty, poorly-run program that doesn't really accomplish anything. This was SUCH a partisan move on the Nobel people. And that Gore guy was a Democrat, too! What the hell did he do to deserve it, other than throw away any future political ambitions to make a book and powerpoint presentation that may have been the most catalytic effort in the advocacy for climate change since the fucking ice caps started melting?
Or, maybe, I dunno, they're giving it away to people who think before they just start vomiting out idiotic, bitter and divisive banter.
I don't even know why we're pissed about this. We don't take you seriously, and we especially didn't after we watched Stewart tear you a new one a few years ago:
The Daily Show With Jon StewartMon - Thurs 11p / 10c
John Bolton
www.thedailyshow.com
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Jackass...

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