You big, dumb, walrus-looking douche

Seriously, what a chode.

You really have to give it up to John Bolton. After being appointed U.S. Ambassador by George W. Bush and thus eternally associated with the failure, incompetence and dishonesty that the former president's administration was most famous for, he is taking the ground that everyone else from that era seems to be taking: the embittered, overly-critical and skeptical over all things Democratic ground. It's like they fell on their head and have forgotten how piss-poor the last eight years have been. Anyway, here's Captain Grundel on Obama's guilt trip Nobel Peace Prize nomination:

“I was nominated three years ago and I’m still waiting for the call,” laughs Bolton. “Today’s news is just another demonstration of how politicized the Nobel Peace Prize has become, from President Carter winning in 2002, to Al Gore in 2007, and President Obama in 2009.

You're so right, mustache! Because Carter's Habitat for Humanity is such a shitty, poorly-run program that doesn't really accomplish anything. This was SUCH a partisan move on the Nobel people. And that Gore guy was a Democrat, too! What the hell did he do to deserve it, other than throw away any future political ambitions to make a book and powerpoint presentation that may have been the most catalytic effort in the advocacy for climate change since the fucking ice caps started melting?

Or, maybe, I dunno, they're giving it away to people who think before they just start vomiting out idiotic, bitter and divisive banter.

I don't even know why we're pissed about this. We don't take you seriously, and we especially didn't after we watched Stewart tear you a new one a few years ago:

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John Bolton
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Jackass...

I can has vile, contemptible nonsense?

I love you, Daily What, for making this.
Friend of the blog Monsieur Stewart also had some funnies to say about Mr. Frank's - well, frank - comments to a Town Hall teabagger.

The horse's mouth

"Yeah, right, well if all those socialist democrats want healthcare, tell 'em to go to Canada! See how happy they are about their doctors!"

Those were the words I heard a passerby utter to a friend today as I was buying a pack of gum. Two sentences that were so poorly backed-up, so ridiculously obtuse and credulous that I finally could not withstand the anger and frustration that had been building up for, well, since I learned what socialism actually meant.

"Do you know how Canadians feel about their health care? For all we know they might be okay with it," I said, without the slightest hint of asshole in my tone.

"Do you?" She replied.

And that's when I realized that, albeit my inquiry was not as abrasive, I too had nothing with which to back it up. I genuinely did not know how Canadians felt about their healthcare system at all. It was either quickly call my friend who lives in Canada, or get out of the conversation fast; I chose the latter (read: I'm a huge pussy).

So I checked out a few polls, and found a recent (June), fairly balanced one concerning Canadians and their approval of said healthcare system. And the result? I win.

OTTAWA -- Canadians think their American neighbours would be wise to look north as they grapple with a massive health-care overhaul.

That's the conclusion drawn from a new poll published as Capitol Hill legislators debate a plan to cover nearly all Americans with government-run health insurance.

The Canadian Press Harris-Decima survey suggests 82 per cent of Canadians believe our system is better than U.S. health care.
...
"I think there's a growing sense that going fully private, or having some version of an almost fully private model like the American one, doesn't necessarily serve the broader interest the way Canadians would want it to be served," said Harris-Decima vice-president Jeff Walker.

Well, looks like they're not jumping off of the falls after all, praying that they don't hit a rock and instead get swept away by a current to the friendly shores of Buffalo, where the doctors are abundant, the nurses aplenty and the vicodins delicious. Seems to me like they're, like I said to my new friend, okay with it.