Bling blang bloozy

Hot damn there's enough ice on here to need a blue line:

(Why don't you read Pensblog yet?)

'Tis a shame that Detroit could not have snagged these. Since they had to use their last set of Stanley Cup rings to honor their dark pact with Satan and thus no longer have them in their possession, these ones could have been melted down and used as currency over there - or at least as a reserve that equals just a little over four times the amount of Michigan's current GDP. Bummer.

Closest shave since Britney Spears

This was taken during a demonstration preceding a boat race on the Detroit River during Chrystler's annual APBA Gold Cup. In the photograph is one of the last people left in the city of Detroit after a mass exodus to upstate Michigan, where the entire city is now sloshed and listening to Kid Rock.

Note to self: do not screw around with the US Navy.

Justice is swift in the city of flightless birds and steel workers

Picture via Pensblog. Pittsburgh's finest showed these jokes a really nice time on the side of the igloo last night. Stay classy, gentlemen.

We still managed to get a few jobs in before the authorities stepped in, although we didn't accomplish the theft of the cup like I had planned. Oh well; we know who had the last laugh in the end.

Hey, asshole in the pimped-out Red Wings wagon:

You got jobbed last night. Real bad. Humiliated, by the authors of this blog no less.

And you were creative enough to say "Fuck you man!" as you drove away. Like that was the best you could do.

Granted we said a few choice things that would have made anyone from Detroit want to punch the next 30 newborns delivered in Pittsburgh right in the face, you were driving this:

What you have to do to a GM vehicle to raise its resale value

And you drove it here. In our house. We saw your broke ass driving around downtown all day at 20 mph like you were hot shit, and the minute we embarrassed you in front of all those people who were laughing at your second-rate demolition derby ride and your miserable city, you disappeared. Haven't seen you since.

Can't even take a good jobbing. Next time you come flaunting that elementary school science project Stanley Cup ornament on your roof in our city, expect it to be much worse. 'Cause we'll be right there dahntahn again waiting for you next game. Frankly, it's a mystery how you got that thing out of here last night unscathed.

You come into our city and insult us like that, and Maxime "Leonidas" Talbot gets pissed. Real pissed. And we know what happens from there:

Tomorrow. DO IT.