This week in unneccessary religious chaos

You gotta love Malaysia for getting pissed off all the time over American movies, TV shows and music. Apparently, the entertainment coming from a nation that still thinks Dinosaurs only died a few thousand years ago, the ice caps melting is really just angel tears and scientific theories are sidelined in favor of southern-accent-peppered televangelist interpretations of Biblical allegories is too gratuitous and sexual for their hardline Islamic eyes.

It appears that Malaysian religious leaders don't want Beyonce coming to their shores and performing her bubbly, scantily clad, well-choreographed numbers and getting all those Malaysian men all hot and bothered.

Knowles also canceled a planned performance in Malaysia in 2007 following protest threats by the opposition Islamic party. At the time, her talent agency said the show was called off due to a scheduling conflict.

Instead, Knowles went to Indonesia, also a largely Muslim country, which has less stringent rules about how performers should dress and behave. Female artists at Malaysian concerts are required by government rules to cover up from the shoulders to knees, with no cleavage showing.

No cleavage?! No wonder these people are so angry all the time. And doesn't Malaysia owe us the right to sport our American cleave whenever we want to after we saved their political system from the clutches of this man?

You're welcome, you ungrateful bastards.