Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Really, dude from Growing Pains?

Turns out when you're a subpar actor in an 80's sitcom and your services are no longer needed now that you've flushed all of that coke, hairspray and Reaganomics out of your system, you turn to evangelism. Which, after all, isn't a bad route to take when the chips are down. Either way, the kid from Growing Pains (who the fuck actually knows his name) released this clever and really breakthrough idea about how to handle the upcoming anniversary of Darwin's satanist work of literature that has since poisoned the minds of our youth and damned all of us to a fiery chasm of sodomy and death. Check it out for yourself:

Breakin' real ground there, Copernicus: combat an idea by amending the book that the idea is in. Real mature. Way to take out all of your aggression about the fact that not everyone in this country is super privy on you all being obnoxious religious nutjobs in public places on science. That's worked for your kind before.

Can you imagine the pants-shitting that would go on among evangelicals if we asked them if, right before God switches the light on in Genesis, we throw a little hubbub about the Big Bang Theory? Or maybe right at the spot when he creates Adam, we place a small disclaimer saying that some people think this process took a couple million years and it involved Adam evolving rather than just appearing out of thin air, riding a Jesus Horse and thinking about America?

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